Don't let this pink outfit,
or cheerful smile fool you.
This girl is Satan - in pink girl form.
(The singer of that horrid song. Focus your hate... I hope she never reproduces, EVER!)

This song is evil, it's... the single most horrifying thing I've ever witnessed. It scared me, DON'T LET THEM TAKE YOU TOO! CHARLIE! Come in, Charlie? NOOOOOOOOOOO!

Gasp.

Now, allow me to compose myself and start from the beginning. Here goes nothing...

I was just innocently browsing my Internet on a Friday afternoon, the sky was clear, the birds were singing, the flowers blooming, etc, etc, yada, yada, yada. Then... as if from nowhere...

Nichole: *poke* Have you seen the cake song? 

Adrian Snrub: No? Should I?

Nichole: [Insert link of doom here] Yes, it's addictive.

Now, I do not wish to inform you of the one minute and forty seven seconds of agony that was to follow, but this video clip song thing, is definately a leap forward to scientists who are trying to prove the non-existance of God. 

Thankyou, Nichole.

Why did some twisted freak invent this this song? Why? Oh Lord! WHY DO YOU MOCK ME? All I know is that I'm scared, very scared for the good of mankind... The end is nigh! This song is a sign from the devil.
It's the only valid explanation I can come up with - to how it came into being..

Violence against women, Australia says "no";

Cruelty against humanity, America says "yes".

Those bastards!

I'm currently working on a letter of complaint, we're sending a few of our men as decoys to throw off the blockade at present. We are prepared for battle, and our men will stop at nothing. The battle shall take place at 0800 hours.

Conscription won't be necessary as we suspect that people will enroll due to free will to help our desperate cause, anyone who doesn't enlist, ought to be ashamed of themselves. Please be advised the enemy are heavily armed with bright colours, and disturbing music. We only have one chance to take this b*tch out, right, let's move it out!

Right here are the numbers:

We have: Six billion
They have: One small pink girl.

I think we stand a fighting chance...

A movie trailor which I've written might entice you to view this vicious piece of crap:

Beware, a legacy of pain, horror, terror, and puppets...

... there is a time to run, and a time to cry, a time to choke, and a time to die...

Behold, a song that rhymes "cake" with "cake"...

...and makes all these horrible things... reallity.

Crazy Town presents...
A Satanic Production.

"Cooking By The Book"

OUT NOW: Horrified? You damned well should be!*

* Life insurance sold individually at all participating cinema outlets, what cost can you place on a life? Be prepared! Please note we are not liable for any damages, especially haemorrhages or mental damage caused. To protect your eyes, goggles will do nothing. You are hereby held responsible for your own stupidity in clicking this link.

It's a piece of cake to bake a pretty cake
If the way is hazy
You gotta do the cookin' by the book
You know you can't be lazy

Never use a messy recipe
The cake will end up crazy
If you do the cookin' by the book
Then... you'll... have... a... cake!

Alright. Kill me. Make it quick and painless, please!

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